Suka Duka Memimpin CG (1)

Ternyata susah juga ya untuk komit nulis blog tiap hari. Kadang uda keburu males duluan, kadang juga gak tau mau tulis apa :P Yah, hari ini mau cerita tentang komsel aja deh.

Jadi, jadwal CG dipindahin jadi hari Kamis yang biasanya Jumat. Terus mulai dari tadi pagi, satu anak bbm bilang gak bisa dateng karena ada urgent matters. Ok. Menjelang siang ada lagi yang bbm bilang gak bisa, dan sisa anak-anak lainnya pada gak ada kabar. Di sms gak dibales, di bbm gak dibales. Fiuh.. Keki tingkat dewa!

Jadi sekitar jam 5an, saya uda bbm ko Yesa untuk ijin gak CG soalnya yang bisa cuma satu orang dan dia pun cowo. Kalo mau pertemuan ya ok, tapi kalo gak juga gapapa. Soalnya emank gak disarankan cuma CG berduaan dengan lawan jenis. Ditambah saya juga males, karena besok mesti flight pagi.

Terus saya super down. Ini anak-anak di smsin berkali-kali, di telp juga gak diangkat. Kenapa tumben bener bisa banyak banget yang berhalangan dan gak bisa CG. Total CG saya kira-kira bisa 10orangan lah kalo lengkap hadir semua. Terus masa 8orang gak bisa serentak. Haiah, ada apa dengan CG ini. Apa saya kurang doanya, apa saya tidak menjadi contoh yang baik, apa yang buat anak-anak jadi gak excited CG, etc etc.

Menurut gw, pelayanan yang paling melelahkan adalah pelayanan pengembalaan. Mesti follow up, mesti bagi hidup, mesti tau gimana pergumulan mereka etc. Gak gampang dan takes so much of energy, time and effort. Ketika temen gw tanya, gimana rasanya jadi pemimpin CG? Gw jawab, duh cape ati kadang. HAHA. Well, bukan karena anak-anak gw badung yah, tapi karena lebih ke beban moral yang ditanggung. Sebagai pemimpin, kamu dilihat, dicontoh, dan dipertimbangkan dalam hal sekecil apapun. Dan temen gw ini balesin, ya bagus donk kalo gak cape ati berarti belon sepenuh hati. 

Dari jawaban dia, gw langsung DEG. Iya juga yah, well walopun cape and keki tapi ya at least gw udah give my best dan trying my best. Sisanya di tangan Tuhan. Dalam mimpin CG ini, seringkali gw diingetin kalo sebenernya mereka tuh cuma titipan dari Tuhan, they are not mine and will never be mine. Jadi boleh stress, tapi gak boleh sampe depresi or stress banget. Karena pada dasarnya, keselamatan bersifat pribadi.

No doubt many times I feel like giving up. Bener-bener mau murtad haha, berasa gak mampu, dan masi mau enjoy life (yang dibaca: mau lari dari tanggung jawab). Gw mimpin CG itu dari gw umur 18taon. Pas gw masi di Singapore. Ketika ditunjuk dan dipilih, there's no room for saying no. Leader gw tau, gw tipe orang yang perlu dicemplungin dulu baru bisa berenang dengan sendirinya. And you guess what is my first reaction? I cried! Muahaha. Stress la bok, gw dulu tugas kul aja bisa ampe ga tidur ini mesti urusin CG lagi. Terus gw orang Jakarta di tengah Medanlang, bukan gw rasis ye. Tapi bahasa mereka kan hokian. Terus juga im the youngest, semua uda much older 21something.

Lalu for good dari Singapore ke Indo, saya pikir bisa leha-leha ni bebas ahaha mo nyantai dulu. Eh tau-tau dalem 3 bulan di GMS di promote jadi leader lagi. Terus gw mati-matian nolak donk ya.. Tapi si Ko Yesa setiap kali ketemu gw selalu bilangnya, jangan kaya yunus kamu nie ntar dimakan paus loh. Dan kata-kata itu jadi rhema buat gw. Terus gw gak berani lari deh wkwkwk.

Jadi leader bukan berarti saya lebih baik dari yang lain etc etc, tapi ntah mengapa seberapa capenya dan kekinya saya mimpin CG tetep aja my CG member took almost 60percent of my thoughts. Bener-bener belajar banyak hal dan gimana lay down semuanya sama Tuhan.

Dan tadii tiba-tiba jam 6.30 pada balesin sms and bbm gw bilang bisa dateng. Yeyeayeayy haha. Jadilah kita komsel berenam dan main uno sampe ketawa ngakak mules. And one more thing I learn today, everything is not gonna be easy but its gonna be worth it. So never give up on people like God never give up on you :)

Blessed night. And tomorrow is my birthday!! UHUY! And Im gonna spend it at Semarang :) Ko Y's hometown. Ihiy, super excited!! Benernya gak purposely ke sono karena bday sih, niat amat yak. Ini karena Ci Lenna married, and she hire me as MUA for her bridesmaid. Terus tanggal 7 meridnya dan di Semarang pula. Pas banget yaa.. I never celebrate my birthday with my friends for the whole day. Waktu di sing juga kekna ga pernah deh, gw di sing kerjanya bikin tugas dan tugas dan tugas. And now, I celebrate my birthday with my loved one at someplace that I never went before. Dan ini Ko Y ambil cuti buat temenin ke Semarang sekalian dia pulang kampung juga. Now you can imagine how excited I am rite. Hihi!!

Scrapframe

I am not in the mood of talking or writing, so may the pictures says it all.
Finish this two scrapframe within a half day. Yeay yeay!! Kemajuan bok, biasanya satu scrapframe lama bener. I guess, practices really makes perfect. Ayoo, di orderr :)

Marry Your Daughter

Very soon I'm hoping that.. 
I Can marry your daughter 
And make her my wife 
I want her to be the only girl that I love for the rest of my life 
And give her the best of me 'till the day that I die

I'm gonna marry your princess
And make her my queen
She'll be the most beautiful bride that I've ever seen 

I can't wait to smile 
When she walks down the isle 
On the arm of her father 

Isn't that very sweet? This is one of the sweetest song I've ever heard!! I'm so touched and agree with Sylvia says, which girl doesn't want this? I know this song from her blog, here. Alrite, call me a hopeless romantic girl. Yes, I am. I am in love with love :P And how I adore love story with great ending!

Since the day that we met 
I'm scared to death to think of what would happen if she ever left
So don't you ever worry about me ever treating her bad 
I've got most of my vows done so far 
So bring on the better or worse
And tell death do us part 
There's no doubt in my mind

I really love this song, the lyrics is so beautiful! It's true to every words and this guy must be very sweet! My favorite sentence, Im gonna marry your princess and make her my queen.. AWW! And here is the video, do enjoy!

Weeping Is No Longer Enough

Do you guys know about Miley Cyrus? She's ex-disney star. Before you read my post, you may like to read this link first. And Below is a very interesting article, response to what Miley did. Source from here.

***

Picking up a sub sandwich today, I saw a news report on CNN about Miley Cyrus’ performance at last night’s VMA’s. I was shocked, then sickened, then saddened.

For the rest of the day, I wondered:

What kind of people are we?

What kind of culture have we created?

What do we want our children to be?

No more wondering. Tonight, I weep.

I weep for the little girl who gave us Hannah Montana and became a role model to millions of little girls across America.

I weep for the lostness of a girl who doesn’t see herself stumbling around in the dark.

I weep for the news channels that profit from their all-day coverage of a young woman spiraling out of control.

I weep for the American Idol culture that promises glitter and gold to children, then chews them up and spits them out.

I weep for an entertainment culture that celebrates the breaking of every social taboo and the casting off of every restraint, only then to turn and mock the stars that follow suit.

I weep for a tabloid culture that finds celebrity gossip and embarrassing moments titillating.

I weep for women enslaved by a false view of sexual liberation.

I weep for men (myself included) who have failed to say, “Enough is enough.”

I weep for all the times I’ve looked at women as objects and failed to see them as someone’s sisters and daughters.

I weep for the fathers of Miley Cyrus, Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Madonna, and all the family members of all the other women who feel they have to sexualize themselves to achieve success.

I weep for my five-year-old little girl, who twirls around like a princess and hugs me tight at night, when I think of the world she is growing up in, the world I will send her into.

I weep for the broken, messed-up world we live in.

But then I weep at the power of grace.

There’s Jesus, lifting the head of a woman of the night and sending her away into the light. There’s Jesus in a crowd, healing a woman desperately trying to cover the shame. There’s Jesus at the well, transforming a woman tossed aside by multiple men.

Weeping is no longer enough. Now, I pray.

***
Kalimat terakhir ngena banget buat gw, simple yet very powerful words. Weeping is no longer enough. Now, I pray. Huehehe. Nancep banget buat gw, jadi inget kadang gw suka mengasihani diri sendiri. Menangis sama Tuhan, dan mempertanyakan kenapa begini kenapa begitu. Yes, God can be move with our sincerely hearts that cry for help. For it is written in Psalm 34:18 that the Lord is close to the brokenhearted. YET, do we pray about our problem as much as we talked about it? Again, weeping is no longer enough, lets bring it in prayer :)

Let's Welcome Septemer With 30 Day Challenge

Hooop! I can't believe it this is september already :) My favorite month after December of course. Whyy? Because this is my birthday month!

I love it when my closest ones start asking me questions like, what do you want for your birthday present? Where will you treat us? etc etc etc hihi :p And receiving the birthday wishes and present *wink*

Yahh, sebenarnya akhir-akhir ini saya lagi feel so empty and lazy to do anything gitu. Lagi berasa kok hidup gini-gini ajah, rutinitas belaka. There's up and yes there's down in life. Im not in a period of having problem anyway, I just lost my excitement :( Have you ever feel that way?

And I know its soooo not good! And not healthy! And look at this blog, havent updated for quite sometimes *sigh* due to my laziness.

So I dare my self to do a simple challenge for this 30days, until september ends. Dulu ada pendeta yang kotbah di gereja singapore gw dan bilang kalo rutinitas yang dilakukan selama 21 hari secara berturut-turut dan rutin akan menjadi habits kita, he said he knew it based on the research from the psychology side thingy. I think its worth to try :)

Alrite here some challenge that I will do:
-. I will (try) do a posting on this blog everyday, and write things worth riding.
-. Pake lotion 2x sehari, pagi dan malem. Kulit gw super kering dan super males pake lotion urgh!
-. Bikin at least one scrapbook layout each day.
-. Smsin anak-anak CG gw mengenai apa yang gw dapet dari Proverbs. Kan baca amsal satu perikop satu, share yang jadi rhema ke mereka di PAGI hari.
-. Mengurangi porsi cabe ketika makan. Huks.
-. Learn guitar more often.

Wew, kayanya ini aja deh yang pingin dibenahin. Semoga saya bisa, dan saya harus bisa. Saya pasti bisa!